Geneoloy and Background

As many of you know by now, I am adopted and being adopted brought on many questions like “where do I come from?” and “what is my ancestry background?”. Today, all my questions have been answered and new information has been given and revealed to me. Let’s take a magical trip back in history!

Starting in 1710, my Geneology begins with parts of my DNA beginning with West, Central, and South Africa, Ashkenazi Jewish, Sardinian, and Yakut. This is where my ancestry history begins and will until now, with me.

So back when I was in my younger years, I was told and saw that the adoption agency had my background as this: Native Ameican, German, French, English (British), and Irish. That was cool and all but once I did my first DNA Test, I found out a whole lot more.

For instance, I do not have any Native American DNA AT ALL! In fact, I don’t have any AMERICAN DNA. Let’s break this down 😉

European is the highest at 99.2% and consists of the following, they are broken up into groups, the top is the Main Subject and the others like the chapters… European is at 99.2% and so under this, it means that there is some of that region in my DNA: Example: NW European: 91% and British/Irish makes up 38.9% of that.

Northwestern European at 91%
British and Irish: 38.9%
French and German: 16.9%
Scandinavian: 3.6%
Broadly Northwestern European: 31.5%

Southern European: 2%
Sardinian: 0.1%
Broadly Southern European: 1.9%

Eastern European: 1.9%
Ashkenazi Jewish: <0.1%
Broadly European: 4.3%

East Asian & Native American: 0.4%

Southeast Asian: 0.2%
East Asian: Yakut and Broadly East Asian: <0.1%

Sub-Saharan African: 0.3%

West African: 0.1%
Central and South Africa: <0.1
Broadly Sub-Saharan African: <0.1

My British and Irish didn’t start until mid-1800’s

My French and German didn’t start until mid-1860’s

My Scandinavian and Eastern European didn’t start until mid-1740’s

West, Central, and South Africa, Ashkenazi Jewish, Sardinian, and Yakut didn’t begin until the beginning of 1710.

I am so happy I did this because I know where my heritage starts and why I look the way I do

Anthropology | Science of Humanity

Humans often fear the unknown. Part of human nature is to organize and categorize the space around them—physically and mentally. When presented with something new or foreign, some people are eager to accept and learn, while others pull back and prematurely form judgments.

– Unknown

What is Anthropology?

Anthropology is actually the study of different aspects of the human race, for example, relics of the past like The Holy Land, Helter Skelter (Irish Legend) and much more. It’s almost like a history book but with deeper details. There are different types of Anthropology that include Social/Cultural, Linguistic, and Biological/Physical. Each one takes a different approach to what we can learn either about ourselves or the past and present.

This blog post is more about how I learned more about myself by one teacher who asked me 2 different questions, and those will be posted also, and if you want to contribute to the post, add your comments at the end!

The Questions

Describe a time when either A) you were this “other” coming into a new community, or B) you had a strong reaction to an “other” coming into your community.

A) you were this “other” coming into a new community

B) you had a strong reaction to an “other” coming into your community.
What did you learn about your perception of the “norm” and the “other?”
Explain what steps we can take to improve our understanding of others’ cultures, values, or customs.

My Answers

I will answer both A and B so that there can be a clear understanding and what it means to live in one’s shoes.

A. Back in 1999, nearly 20 years ago I came out in the most unbelievable way imaginable by anyone! I was in my room one night, looking at dirty photos like young guys do, but these were not your normal dirty pictures. I knew I was gay but didn’t know how to come out to my parents about it until my mom walked in on me and saw me with the photos. That is all on that part.

I was also the subject of discussion at my dad’s church where he got fired because of me being gay. Well, that was Christianity for ya at its finest! Since then, I haven’t found myself as a contributor to the social hype of the everyday Facebookers, Tweeters, Google+’ers and Instagramers. I am but a spec in the universe no bigger than the smallest star dust. In fact, if you got a microscope you could see me living my life in a bigger than life world.

So is this the norm or is it something that has happened over time? This is where Anthropology kicks in. Fact Check: We have always had a social society from the beginning of time, like back to when the Neanderthals roamed with the Dino’s! Take this for example, back in 1995 the first dating site was introduced into the world called Match.com. Today, in 2017 there are more than half a billion people on dating sites and hookup apps, but why?

The Why

As Technology has advanced from the first light bulb to Dial Up Internet to Wireless Internet, the way we communicate has changed. You can send a text message and talk that way, you can video chat from the comfort of your own home or on the go! This is why nearly 80% of the Earths population is online, that last 20% are those in countries where technology has not found its way or they live in tribes like those in Africa and Australia.

Other Coming into the Community

I have always been the timid type, mainly I have walls up until I am either comfortable with you or know you on a more personal level. Either way, the walls will come down once that level of comfortability is reached. Like my new job working for Panera Bread, there is this guy and I still cannot figure him out. I have my guard and wall up but is seems that one I know something about him, he will let his wall down and then its back up. I read people, and he is possibly reading this thinking I am some weirdo! When I read someone, I look for different things from what I can see, the eyes, mouth, facial features and more.

I will give information out, but I will give enough out so that it will be easier for me to let my wall down. I have been hurt many times before, and I know that everyone says “don’t harbor on the past, live for today and love for tomorrow”. I have my wall and guard up because I don’t like the feeling of my exiled then have to put the walls back up.

I am a good guy, just takes me a while with different people to let my guard down and here is a good example, if I like a guy, my guard will be up until I know him on a personal level and during this “trial” period I will slowly give some information out. But that is about it.

Which Anthropology was It?

This post is about all the basic Anthropologies out there. The Linguistics, Social/Cultural and even the Biological/Physical Anthropologies. See, we live each day and during that day we judge others based on what they look like, how well they communicate and so on.

Labels

Labels Belong on Bottles…. Not People!

This is a touchy subject because ever since I can remember I was labeled from stupid, idiot, loco/crazy and more to fag, queer and a lot of derogatory names. So, this is a bit touchy since I haven’t talked too much about it. Please bear with me in this post as it might actually get a little risky and personal.

Young and Alone

I was adopted at birth basically and never knew who my real parents are until this coming Friday when I start my official search. I knew at a very young age, that something wasn’t right or that I didn’t fit in. I didn’t look like anyone in the family and that made me think. Sometimes as a kid, I did overthink things only because I wanted answers but couldn’t find the way to ask the questions. So as time went on, I started to get bullied in school as kids would call me Fagget, Queer, Homosexual…. I mean, back then, kids were really mean and their parents didn’t do crap about it, just like today.

Once I started in the higher grades like 7th through 9th, it almost stopped but it didn’t really help anything. Kids in band and choir and orchestra really stood up for me, as I was the new kid on the block. They helped me spell because of my dyslexia, helped me understand what the questions were asking because of my ADHD… I mean, I had a great group of people around me, until I went to 2 smaller schools where kids were free to make fun of other because of they disabilities.

I was so alone, that I tried to end it all my Junior year of High Shcool. I tried to give myself a concussion,  tried to OD on painkillers and so much more. It was like all the things that happened to me as a kid were pushed to the back of my mind until people started back up with it again. That was the worst time in my life, just one of them.

Young Adult who Mingled

By the time I was 17, I was already mingling with guys, gay men actually and it was like it felt good to me. I knew who I was and was proud of it. I was still alone, went through a lot of depression in my younger years but that’s not what caused most of my issues. It was guys who played games with me mentally or in today’s world, psychologically. I know that sounds weird but it is so true. I was with my first ex for about 2 years, close to the end of the relationship it wasn’t all that grand and in fact, we drifted apart from each other. After that, my relationships last between 3-9 months. That says a lot right there and with some of the issues I was working through, none of the guys wanted to help me. They were there just to get the booty or my junk which I quickly blocked that crap!

Older Adult without Labels

Today, if you ask me who I am, I will tell you this…. I am Matt. Matt is a gay man, gay uncle, cousin, nephew, brother, son, best friend and free therapy. I don’t label myself as homosexual, gay, queer, twink, bear or anything. I am simply, Matt who is living is life and working on bettering himself through education and work. So if someone ever asks you who you are tell them this… I have no labels, I am Matt (or your name) and give them a list of things you are good at or what part of the family you are, your name is the ONLY label that should be there.

Be You, Be Proud

The Social Click at Church… Good or Bad?

This is a post from my official blog at https://mattstory.me

The views on this post are mine and mine alone. Experiences are recalling different memories about it. You are free to agree or disagree, please do not shove it in my face.

Growing Up in a Christian Home

As far back as I can remember, which is when I was forced to wear a little kids suit for church, was not the best memory of all. In fact, I have always felt distant from religion and what it brings. As a kid, I always liked Sunday School because I didn’t have to hear my dad preach, but as I got older, it was more of a “You have to sit with us…” kind of thing which really didn’t make sense to me. But if you think every religious family is perfect, think again.

No matter what religion you are, Christian, Catholic, Roman Catholic, Hinduism and many others, there is always gonna be some type of conflict as I like to call it. These “conflicts” usually come when people open their minds to different possibilities. For me, the story below is what I mean.

Summer 2000

It was the beginning of the summer of 2000 and I was at my wits end with everyone and trying to understand who I was a person both psychically and sexually. So, at that time I went to my youth pastor, whom I felt I could tell anything and talk with. Well they meet me at a local restaurant and they bought my dinner and we started talking and I told them that I need help in finding who I am. Well, I never told them I was gay, just that I am having issues with my sexuality. So a few days later my father gets fired from his Church, in which I was really wondering why it happened.

My mother, the day after he lost his job said to me…. “You are the reason why your father lost his job, Cody went to the elders and said you are gay” – without hesitation I called that little prick and gave him a piece of my mind. And to this day, my mother still tells me that and it makes me so f****** angry that she would hold on to something that is 17 yrs old.

The Social Click

So my parents have been going to this church and I’ve been a few times but never really liked it because I don’t fit in with the “IT Crowed”. No, I am not talking about the Information Technology Crowed, more like the Social Click at that church. Yes, there are people who go to just go and socialize and then there is me, someone who want’s answers to questions but no one seems to have them other than this response “Read the Bible”… I am gonna be honest, as a kid, I was actually forced to read the bible, a chapter a night. I know what the bible says, which is man made, but where are the answers to like why we feel pain, love and so on. Why do we have a brain that is easily manipulated? So many questions yet no true answer to any of them.

So, the social click at church started some drama. Another reason why I hate churches, and it doesn’t just end there. It’s the fact that a lot of Christians (50%) are so wrapped up in their own little bundle of joy life that when change comes, they are scared. Take for instance Kim Davis, back in 2015 she was in the news a lot because of her refusal of issuing the marriage license to same-sex couples. Well, this is a great example of how a “Good Christian” can turn their backs on everything they are taught. I mean, there are people, that are die hard Christians that work in Government positions like County Clerks that obey the law because they do a Separation of Church and State.  So going on with the post, it is sad that when things like this happen, Christians (not all) believe they are being attacked and scolded of their rights…right? Wrong, in fact, over the past 30-40 years, Religion as has gotten some bad raps, mainly for allowing students to bully LGBT and other students.

What/Who I am Now

I am what most of the old schooled Christians would say, Witch or Warlock. In fact, I am neither since I do not do magic. Shamans are Native American Spirit Healers or Spirit Walkers. This means that with positive energy, I can pass that along to help prolong someone’s life by reducing stress and so on. Shamans are also known to have the gift or ability to see what others cannot or do not want to see. I do not practice a religion, I do believe in a higher power but not the way Churches and other Religions say to be true to them.

Growing Up Gay

mattieboitzMost of you may know me as Mattie, but my real name is Matthew. I am a son of a previous Preacher, who lost his job due to a Youth Minister, who went behind my back and told the eldership that I was gay, before I came out and told anyone. This is my story.

The Beginning of What Was

In 1998, I began a journey through, as it was called then, the Gay World. I was conflicted and wasn’t sure of anything. At 16 I was really scared of what life was about to give me. I had a hard time with a lot of stuff, from my own sexuality to exploring the sexual side of everything else. It was really hard because growing up in a Christian Home I was taught that being gay was wrong, and that you will go to hell. They even said that Gay Men/Women are perverts and will also be that way. I am not that way, I am not in anyway a pervert, just don’t ask my close friends, hehe.

It was a really hard time for me, during which time I thought about suicide because not only was it a conflict with being a Christian (at that time), kids were bullying me because of it. I tried everything from overdosing to small cuts on my legs and arms, in which there is no evidence of that now.

But I soon realized that there was a world out there that accepted me for me, not just parts of me, but the whole me as a gay man. It was the best feeling but didn’t realize that clubs and bars were meat markets or hook up locations. I am not proud of going to bars and clubs because that was like a bad discussion waiting to explode. Other than the bars and clubs, I was really avid in the parades that are held once a year in my one town that I loved to go to, Dallas!

The Now – Grown Up

Over the years, I grew further and further away from religion and everyone else around me, and started on a downward spiral on a path that was leading me to the worst choices I would ever make in my life. To be honest, I am glad I experienced that, so that I know what not to do this time, because you only get one chance at life. During the time periods of 2001 and 2015 were the worst times for me.  It was like I would get into a relationship and then get beaten, and same thing. I went through 3 different relationships which were physical beatings, and then my last official one was more of a psychological/mental abuse.

I haven’t had the best of luck with relationships, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t anyone out there for me. In fact, I believe we are given a chance of self-rediscovery to understand who we are, and what we would like in a partner or boyfriend/girlfriend. We are in a digital world with a digital way of love and being social.

Have you had the same or similar experience? if so, post it below… You are not alone!